•  I SUCK AT DRIVING. Our main road outside my neighborhood is being turned into four lanes (two on each side, you know. idk what the proper term is.) so they have most of the road messed up on the sides. Well, my mom took me out driving at night and I'm still not that great at it. I keep going straight rather than conform with the road and I go off into this like dirt road next to it, all while thinking: "HMM THE ROAD IS REALLY ROUGH THEY'RE DOING A CRAPPY JOB AT THIS ROADWORK JEEZ."

My mom: Honey, you're going off the road.
Me: ...I GUESS I AM. *goes into the RIGHT road* WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME EARLIER?!
My mom: Well, I didn't want you to go spastic and veer into the other lane!
Me: A;SKFHGLH;JKFHFRY

lmfaflamfoa my mom. oh my god.

We went to McDonald's to get Sweet Tea and decided to get some munchies to eat. She got some chicken nuggets and I got double cheeseburger, which both facts are completely irrelevant to this story, okay. Well, we waited like 7 minutes for 2 Sweet Teas, 2 small fries, a burger, and nuggets. We're like :|. In the meantime, we talked about which part of the chicken the nuggets at Mickey D's come from and she said chicken balls. I laughed. c:

The guy finally comes, gives us our food, and my mom asks: "What sauce do you have?"

Guy: HAVE A NICE NIGHT. COME AGAIN SOON. :| *shuts door*
Mom: Hey... HEY. HEY.

HE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK AT US. So my mom is like grinning and I'm like FUCK. She makes me pull up to the little rest place you check your food at and she goes into the joint to get her sauce. I ate half of her fries while I waited. :i

Anyway, I'm too lazy to explain but this is what she said:

"Okay, I go in and there is the guy. I asked him if I could get sauce more than once. He ignores me and goes to the back. Finally some woman with an ice cream cone walks by and I'm like CAN I GET SOME SAUCE?! and she gives me some. I was going to ask to see the manager and then I realized that the guy who gave us our order is the manager. So I stole 30 napkins because I don't feel like buying more this week. I thought about mixing up their sugars too. *makes grabby hands*"

LMFOAJHG I LOVE MY MOM. LIKE I WAS LAUGHING FOREVER. She refers to her sauce as "her awards from Hell." I hope she enjoyed them.

Anyway the cop thing is a lie. Lmfao. No, I was driving straight and he was coming down the street to the right of me and suddenly turned on his lights and I freaked out in the OMG COP way. He turned the other way. I just needed an interesting cut. :i